The Art of Managing Up: Thriving in the ‘Mystery Meeting'

It’s 4:57 p.m., and you get the calendar invite: “Meeting with [Boss’s Name]” — no topic, no agenda, no hint. If your heart rate just spiked, you’re not alone.

I’ve been in that spot more times than I can count, and over the years I’ve learned that the unknown meeting doesn’t have to be a cause for panic. In fact, it’s a golden opportunity to show up prepared, grounded, and ready to shine — even when you have no idea what’s coming.

Here’s my simple, human-centered approach to preparing for those mystery meetings.

Step 1: Start with Them

Before you think about what you’ll say, think about who you’ll say it to. Ask yourself:

• What’s their role and what outcomes are they driving right now?
• What’s the current climate in their team or in the company?
• Has something happened recently that might be top of mind for them?

When you understand their world, you can meet them where they are.

Step 2: Decide How You Want to Show Up

Preparation isn’t just about facts and talking points — it’s about energy.

• How do you want them to feel when they leave the meeting?
• What do you want them to say about you afterward?
• What values do you want to embody in the conversation — and how will you make them visible?

Pro tip: Take a quick wellbeing check. Are you rested, clear-headed, and feeling confident in what you’re wearing? Your presence speaks before your words do.

Step 3: Guide the Conversation

Once you’re in the meeting:

• Check in genuinely — ask “How are you?” and actually listen.
• Read their energy. If they’re scattered, acknowledge it and slow the pace; if they’re low-energy, bring a lift.
• Confirm time: “How much time do we have today?”
• Ask my favorite opener: “What’s one thing I can offer today that would make the biggest difference for you?”

Step 4: Share What Matters

Based on their answer, you might:

• Highlight 2–3 key wins or insights.
• Offer thoughts on culture, operations, or improvements.
• Share a forward-looking perspective on trends or strategy.

Keep it concise, relevant, and tied to their world.

Step 5: Close Strong

End with:

• “Did you get what you needed from today?”
• Clarify next steps — and who’s doing what.
• Thank them, specifically, for something you learned or appreciated in the meeting.

Follow up with a short thank-you email and a recap if it’s appropriate.

Here’s the truth: When you walk into a meeting without an agenda, you have a choice. You can arrive reactive, or you can arrive ready. Preparation isn’t about predicting every twist — it’s about showing up clear, confident, and connected.

The more you practice this, the more you’ll find that managing up becomes less about “handling your boss” and more about creating a partnership built on trust, respect, and results.

Explore how coaching can help you create your own Mystery Meeting Agenda. 

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